Here’s a little bit of my end of year share…
As I sit in my bed I thought, How is it almost 2024? Didn’t we just start 2023?
Maybe for most people, they feel like, rah rah… let’s look at our accomplishment!
And yet my judgemental brain would still come down strong on me.
Then my heart would start pounding, thinking about all the stuff on my plate, and it feels as if I’m being compressed from all sides.
My husband got my son Minecraft for Christmas, but instead of my son playing, I started playing the game.
At first, I didn’t understand what this game was about, but once I started I got lured into it.
It’s called Minecraft because you mine and craft.
And I love the mining.
My brain got super addicted to it, I wanted to see how much of each special material I could obtain.
And I started searching for answers online. How do I do this? How do I get that? What is this thing for? What can I create from it?
I was having fun! All I wanted was to keep playing.
Then I thought, what is so special about this game that my brain got so excited about?
I mean I’m excited about a game… yet sometimes doing life is like, pulling teeth.. why is that? and more importantly, how can I apply it to my life?
And my brain presented this idea to me…
When you studied with your mom when you were 8-9 yo, she would hit you every time you get an answer wrong… that is why!
And logically I knew that.
In this game (or any games) I feel safe. I can’t get it wrong.. and I love success. And games are designed to be easy in the beginning to get you hooked!
In real life, it was ingrained in my brain that it’s not safe to show up.
Whether I was :
Presenting an idea.
Networking with other people.
Showing off my wins..
All of these invite “Judgement”, and I could potentially get hurt.
That’s how my brain puts so much pressure on me.
To be “perfect” or I could get “hit”.
It took me a long time to get to where I am right now.
And I am still working through it.
Yet I am very proud of myself, of how far I’ve come.
To stop my perfectionistic-self from holding me back.
Because each time I stepped up and showed up, it was another piece of evidence to show my brain that:
❤️ I don’t have to be perfect.
❤️ It is okay to step up, even when I’m scared.
❤️ It’s better to show up and do what I want, even when I am not perfect.
Along the way, I am reprogramming my brain to believe that I am more than what I see.
I can go for the impossible, I can do what’s in my heart.
Life is a challenge. And it’s well worth living.
If you’re been beating yourself up for having not accomplished that you’d wanted in 2023, nothing has gone wrong.
It’s a learning process.
But don’t give up. If it is still in your heart, then it is still possible for you.
Sign up for “2024, Let’s Go!” for a 50 min session with me.
And let’s see what is possible for you!
Gift this for yourself for this upcoming year.