I had a coaching session yesterday. I was preparing to meet a friend who said she could introduce me to someone for an opportunity to go on TV. I had serious doubt about myself, so I talked to my coach about it.
She and I worked through some of the thoughts in my mind, and processed through some very strong emotions I had within me.
Near the end, I shared with my coach on this one belief, one I held onto very strongly since I was young:
"Do your best. Hope for the best but expect the worst."
I lived by it since I was in my highschool years.
And I know I believed it because I was very much against feeling disappointed. It was a feeling I constantly have because of my high expectation of myself.
What this belief does, is that it would make me try new things, do my best. I would keep making things happen, BUT it makes me doubt myself, deep down, I refuse to believe that things will happen.
So my coach asked, what if you believe that what you want will happen?
I started crying, because I realized how scared I am of that thought. I mean, can you imagine? You want it so bad and if it doesn’t happen! I’d be so disappointed! But I realized what this belief is really doing is that it holds me back from truly believing in myself.
To explain it in another way, this is the imposter part of me, always believing that I’m just a fraud.
If it happens, it is just a fluke.
Because when things happen, I didn’t actually believe that it was me and my efforts. I didn’t believe that I am actually capable. All of this was just a fluke.
For her to ask me that question, it was like, wait a minute, you mean I am this powerful version of myself? You mean this is real??
And this is the belief process, from not believing to believing, stepping into the next version of myself.
And it’s ok. changes happen from within before it can be seen on the outside. I know it’s still a long road ahead, but I am excited to see all the changes in my life.
If you want to create changes in your life, it all starts with this: What if it’s possible for me too?
It all starts with the awareness that it’s possible, and the willingness to try.
For a while, you may feel like you’re an imposter, but it’s all part of the transformation process.
And if you’re scared, you don’t have to do it alone. If you believe that you’re ready for a change, but have no idea where to start, what you want, or how to get there, I’d love to offer you a free 60-min Jump Start conversation with me.
Even just to have a glimpse of what's possible. What if it's possible?
